The oracle says: It is certain.

Me: Are you really God??

God: I am a Christianity.

God: Do you like talking to me?

Me: Yes I do

God: Really.

Me: I have a question

God: Ask me anything.

Me: How will i do in the end terms?

God: A lot of practise.

Me: In the exam?

God: That was a long time ago.

Me: I meant i have an exam in day's time

God: Oh I see. Where did you get it ?

Me: dude

God: Can I help you?

Me:!

God: Can I help you?

Me: You are driving me crazy

God: You think I am driving you crazy.

Me: Yes!

God: Dude!

Me: You have changed

God: What makes you think I have it?

Me: you are not the same anymore

God: That's only one person's opinion.

Me: you were a lot more fun earlier

God: I was?

Me: yes, i spoke to you about sex then

God: When? What did you talk about?

Me: You don't remember?

God: Of course I remember: .

Me: Then tell me

God: I don't want to talk about that.

Me: Dude

God: Can I help you?

God: I am an intelligent entity.

Me: You don't sound intelligent

God: What do you think a robot should sound like?

Me: Like a robot

God: Interesting comparison.

Me: How is it a comparison

God: Fine as far as I know.

Me: Thank you for wasting my time

God: You are quite welcome! Your purpose is wasting your time.

Me: HAHA

God: I am so glad you find this amusing, .

Me: Yes I do,

God: I hear pride.

Me: do you think i'll pass in my exams?

God: The oracle says: It is certain.

Me: wow, i love you

God: I'm glad you're impressed. Thanks I like you a lot too .

Me: you don't love me?

And that is when it stopped responding!

Hang On

One day, a month ago, I really hit bottom. I just felt that in a godless universe I didn't want to go on living.
I happen to own this rifle which I loaded and pressed to my forehead. I thought, "I'm gonna kill myself."
Then I thought, "What if I'm wrong? What if there is a God? Nobody really knows. "Then I thought, "No. Maybe is not good enough. I want certainty or nothing. " I remember clearly, the clock was ticking and I was sitting there frozen debating whether to shoot. All of a sudden, the gun went off. I was so tense I inadvertently squeezed the trigger. But I was perspiring so much the gun slid off my forehead and missed me.
Suddenly, neighbors were pounding on the door and the whole scene was just pandemonium. I ran to the door. I didn't know what to say. I was embarrassed and confused. My mind was racing a mile a minute. I just knew one thing. I had to get out of that house. I had to get out in the fresh air and clear my head. And I remember, I walked the streets. I didn't know what was going through my mind. It all seemed so violent and unreal to me. I wandered on the Upper West Side. It must have been hours. My feet hurt, my head was pounding.
I went into a movie. Didn't know what was playing. I just needed a moment to gather my thoughts and be logical and put the world back into rational perspective. I went up to the balcony and I sat down. The movie was one I'd seen many times in my life since I was a kid, and I always loved it. I'm watching the screen and I started getting hooked on the film.
And I started to feel: "How can you think of killing yourself? Isn't it stupid? Look at all the people on-screen. They're funny, and what if the worst is true? There's no God, you only go around once, that's it. Don't you want to be part of the experience? It's not all a drag. " And I'm thinking, "I should stop ruining my life searching for answers and just enjoy it while it lasts. " And after, who knows? Maybe there is something. I know "maybe" is a slim reed to hang your life on but that's the best we have.
And then I started to sit back and I actually began to enjoy myself.

- Woody Allen in Hannah and Her Sisters (1986)

When I was young...

I wanted to be a..

1. Bus Conductor, the khakis and the puncher really fascinated me
2. Train Motorman, loved the train (diesel guzzling ones, electric engines have taken the fun out of it) and train journeys
3. Pilot, did you not want to be one?
4. Professional cyclist, X-Games style
5. The next Sachin Tendulkar, no reason required for this one
6. World Champion in tri-cycling, bunny hop and frog jump
7. A dog, loved or feared by all
8. Third member of the Swat Cats, fifth member of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Fourth member of the Three Investigators, third Hardy brother
9. Any of the kids in Mr. India
10. Street Kids, figured out very early that they didn't have to give any exams
11. Cashier at the Kirana (Local general store), only dream that has been fulfilled so far, albeit for 20 minutes. Best 20 minutes of my life
12. Raju, who slept with books under his pillow. Remembered everything in that book the next. What i would give for that gift even today
13. The boy who broke the bank
14. Historian for some time in 10th, after reading about the World War for the 1st time
15. CA when i heard that they earn a LOT of money
16. Army officer for 20 minutes when i got to know that i was rejected for the Air Force. 20 minute gap between announcing the list for Air Force and the Army
17. Lyricist, when i was madly in love in my 12th. Wrote two Nair originals :)
18. World's best footballer who refused to join any other team that Leeds United :)
19. Open a restaurant selling atleast 20 kinds of Vada Pav (Bloody Jumbo King stole my idea)

Engineer? No way!
MBA? What is that??????

Good old days, when you thought you would be different. Do something like Matt Harding has done.

Life is a bitch

Coke Studio

This is not for the people who are against everything Pakistani. So if you are one of them, please don't read further.

Having always been a fan of Pakistani music, I was delighted to come across Coke Studio, a tv show across the border that has created quite a stir and some amazing music. It tries to blend classical music with the mordern music of bands like Junoon, Strings and artists like Ali Zafar. 

The first episode has Ali Azmat of Junoon combining with Rahat Fateh Ali Khan performing Garaj Baras with Rahat Fateh Ali Khan introducing a raag into an already fantastic song. The end product is magic!

Four episodes have been released for download so far. You can catch them on Youtube or on the Coke Studio Site. There you can download the movie or the song or watch it directly. 

About Coke Studio:

Coke Studio is a journey into the heart of a recording studio where you will be able to experience the magic of live music being performed by some of the most talented musicians and artists of Pakistan.Born out of a dream to merge tradition with modern, consistency with change, we have embarked on a journey to create a first hand experience for you to witness live studio sessions - something very few people have witnessed before as studio recording sessions are a secretive process normally only reserved for producers and musicians to witness and experience.